As most of you know I have had a painful back ever since high school. Back then it was mostly that I would just throw my back out overworking it. My back got a lot stronger when I was living with Wayne because I was working and lifting all the time ... then I got a good manual labor job where I was again moving, lifting and bending... I still threw my back out once and a while. I am sure my story is not much different than most people so far but it all started to change when I got a desk job. I tried to stay active and strong but I was not able to keep up with it ... I was throwing my back out monthly. I would go play paintball and come back home crippled or I would go skiing and wake up the next morning not able to move. Yes it sucked ... but I could just go to the doctor and get some painkillers and muscle relaxants and I would be fine.
Then it started getting more and more frequent, twice a month then once a week. So Anna convinced me to go to the doctor and see what was wrong with me. When I went to the doctor about something else I brought it up and he said "Well, if it is still bugging you we will do an x-ray", so the next time I threw my back out I went in and he did an x-ray... nothing ... he said I had a small curve to my back that was hardly worth mentioning but that was it. I am guessing he just chalked it up to my inactivity... and so did I.
I started to have pain all the time to the point that I no longer could do anything ... and I mean anything without throwing my back out... case in point: lifting a 5 pound box from the trunk of a car. That threw it out, so at this point I knew there was something wrong with me. I told my self to keep active and muscle through it. That is the only way I thought I could fix it because I thought it was just my back being weak and needed to be stronger.
Months and months went by with me thinking this is what I needed to do so ... I remodeled the kitchen, the den , and built a deck thinking that doing so would help. Everything I did threw my back out and I would suffer for day and even weeks after. Even after going to the doctor again and again telling him about it all he would say is "Let me give you some exercises to strengthen your back" most of which I was already doing in one way or another with the activities I was doing. The pain started to be constant and I started popping ibuprofen and aspirin like it was candy on a regular schedule and on the max dosage and lo and behold my stomach started to have trouble: pain, ulcers, nausea ... not fun.
About 9 months ago Anna and I changed insurance and that meant I needed to get a new doctor... I got my medical records and went to my new doctor. I told him what was going on and he asked if they had done an MRI. I had never had one and he wanted to find out what was really causing my back pain. He ran a bunch of tests for all sorts of stuff and ordered an MRI... he told me to hold on a minute in the exam room and he was going to check the schedule. I thought that I would have another appointment in a few weeks but lucky for me the MRI was free and so I could go right over and have it done right then. I figured they would get back to me with the results in a few days. A few hours later the doctor called me personally and gave me the results. I have two bulging discs in my lower back. So he gave me some pain killers and made me an appointment with another doctor that does epidural injections of steroids to lower the inflammation so my discs could heal. That appointment was a few weeks later and I was really scared that he was going to stick a giant needle in my back and it would hurt really really badly ... but he gave me some numbing stuff so I almost didn't feel it. After a few days I started to feel better, still having pain but my flexibility came back.
After a few months the injection started to wear off. I started having lots of pain again... so I made another appointment to get another injection. Sadly the second one didn't work at all ... if anything it made things worse. One morning I was in so much pain I was on the floor ... crying in pain ... you know like a man and all... Anna wanted to take me to the ER but I knew they wouln't be able to do anything so I called the doctor. He called me again personally ... on a Sunday and was worried that I might have an infection or the disc may have ruptured so he ordered another MRI and blood tests to make sure I didn't have a spinal infection ... because you know that can kill in hours. I got the tests the next day and luckily they where negative... so we tried another injection. Yet again it didn't do anything. He started to think that we might have to send me to a surgeon to see what he could do.
The appointment with the surgeon was WAY off. I had to wait a month just to talk to the surgeon and in the meantime I needed to work, drive, and you know live so my doctor gave me some stronger painkillers. As most of you know painkillers do not work on me very well... I was taking Loratab 10 mg and they were only taking the edge off and I had been taking them so long they started to not work any more so he put me on Percocet which is working better sometimes I took one an hour ago and I am still hurting now. So ... anyway we finally went to the surgeon and he talked to me and looked at my MRI and hemmed and hawed and told me that there is nothing he can do and that I just had arthritis and I should take Advil. He kinda gave me the feeling that I was imagining the pain and told me that "everyone has bulging discs" and that I basically should just deal with the pain... needless to say Anna started crying because she hates to see me in pain. Everyone told us that we should get another opinion and so that appointment is in a few days.
I know it sounds odd but I just want this to be over, I want the surgery so I can recover and my life can get back to normal. I am getting fat because of this and I can't move much so I can't get out and do stuff. I am also getting very depressed because of this and I have started to have really bad thoughts about... solving the problem... It just hurts so bad.
When you hurt 24/7 and a surgeon tells you basically to suck it up and deal like everyone else I feel like a wimp. I know that people do not walk around feeling like this. No one would ever ski, paintball, work in the yard, or even take out the trash because it hurts too much.
I will make another post when I have more of the story to tell.
About 9 months ago Anna and I changed insurance and that meant I needed to get a new doctor... I got my medical records and went to my new doctor. I told him what was going on and he asked if they had done an MRI. I had never had one and he wanted to find out what was really causing my back pain. He ran a bunch of tests for all sorts of stuff and ordered an MRI... he told me to hold on a minute in the exam room and he was going to check the schedule. I thought that I would have another appointment in a few weeks but lucky for me the MRI was free and so I could go right over and have it done right then. I figured they would get back to me with the results in a few days. A few hours later the doctor called me personally and gave me the results. I have two bulging discs in my lower back. So he gave me some pain killers and made me an appointment with another doctor that does epidural injections of steroids to lower the inflammation so my discs could heal. That appointment was a few weeks later and I was really scared that he was going to stick a giant needle in my back and it would hurt really really badly ... but he gave me some numbing stuff so I almost didn't feel it. After a few days I started to feel better, still having pain but my flexibility came back.
After a few months the injection started to wear off. I started having lots of pain again... so I made another appointment to get another injection. Sadly the second one didn't work at all ... if anything it made things worse. One morning I was in so much pain I was on the floor ... crying in pain ... you know like a man and all... Anna wanted to take me to the ER but I knew they wouln't be able to do anything so I called the doctor. He called me again personally ... on a Sunday and was worried that I might have an infection or the disc may have ruptured so he ordered another MRI and blood tests to make sure I didn't have a spinal infection ... because you know that can kill in hours. I got the tests the next day and luckily they where negative... so we tried another injection. Yet again it didn't do anything. He started to think that we might have to send me to a surgeon to see what he could do.
The appointment with the surgeon was WAY off. I had to wait a month just to talk to the surgeon and in the meantime I needed to work, drive, and you know live so my doctor gave me some stronger painkillers. As most of you know painkillers do not work on me very well... I was taking Loratab 10 mg and they were only taking the edge off and I had been taking them so long they started to not work any more so he put me on Percocet which is working better sometimes I took one an hour ago and I am still hurting now. So ... anyway we finally went to the surgeon and he talked to me and looked at my MRI and hemmed and hawed and told me that there is nothing he can do and that I just had arthritis and I should take Advil. He kinda gave me the feeling that I was imagining the pain and told me that "everyone has bulging discs" and that I basically should just deal with the pain... needless to say Anna started crying because she hates to see me in pain. Everyone told us that we should get another opinion and so that appointment is in a few days.
I know it sounds odd but I just want this to be over, I want the surgery so I can recover and my life can get back to normal. I am getting fat because of this and I can't move much so I can't get out and do stuff. I am also getting very depressed because of this and I have started to have really bad thoughts about... solving the problem... It just hurts so bad.
When you hurt 24/7 and a surgeon tells you basically to suck it up and deal like everyone else I feel like a wimp. I know that people do not walk around feeling like this. No one would ever ski, paintball, work in the yard, or even take out the trash because it hurts too much.
I will make another post when I have more of the story to tell.
I hope you start feeling better soon Scott. I know what its like to be in pain 24/7 and having doctors tell you that it's just in your head. It sucks feeling like no one is listening to you.
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